A Journey to Motherhood | By Jaimie Finkelstein
The below was written by one of Jaime Marks’ patients and dear friends. Thank you for sharing your story with us—it’s one many share.
My husband and I experienced a very early miscarriage in February of 2017. The grief that followed was unlike any I had experienced. I think talking about this kind of loss is still somewhat taboo, and people often don’t know what to say, so it can be extremely isolating as well as devastating. I employed every coping strategy in the book for months to feel better—to get my life back. Diet, exercise, weekly therapy, taking off work, throwing myself harder into work, vacationing: You name it, I tried it. But I couldn’t shake the depression. On the outside I’m sure my life looked okay, but on the inside I was suffering in a way I couldn’t quite understand.
People would say things like “the miscarriage was just a blip on the radar,” or “you’ll be pregnant before you know it,” but that was not the case. My OBGYN suggested I try Femara, a drug taken to stimulate egg production for women with fertility issues. I felt terrible when I took it and quickly stopped, which made me feel worse emotionally, with the added challenge of hormone imbalances.
In the fall of 2017 I decided to try acupuncture, and take it seriously. I had dabbled in it before but never stuck with it, mostly due to the cost and patience required. I looked up practitioners in my area and called many, hoping my insurance would cover part of it, and that I would trust the person who was on the other end. I am a person who does believe in a lot of alternative medicine, and in my experience it’s very important to be aligned with the right doctor/practitioner.
After talking to several people, I came across an acupuncturist who I trusted immediately from our first phone call. She was so down to earth, matter-of-fact, and completely confident she could help me. Not only did we immediately click, but she had an office in both the town I worked and lived—it truly felt meant to be. She investigated my insurance to determine if I could be covered, and I unfortunately was not. I felt deflated as I wanted to give it a shot, but knew I couldn’t sustain regular sessions. I thanked her for her time and efforts, but she replied, “just come in for a session, I want to help you.” It was the first time I felt heard and cared for in a medical environment—and so began my acupuncture journey.
I won’t delve into every aspect of the journey, but it was a holistic one during which I learned about fertility, how my body needed to be re-calibrated after my miscarriage, and how my hormones needed to be balanced and managed. My acupuncturist became such an integral and valuable resource for me for both practice and information, and yet I never felt pushed, or like the practice was too “out there” for me to maintain.
She helped me figure out what my cycle really was, how to regulate and nourish it. When I experienced moments where I got impatient or overwhelmed, she reminded me that acupuncture isn’t a “quick fix,” and that she was confident I’d get pregnant, despite my personal doubts.
I went religiously to my appointments for nine months, and low and behold, in early June 2018 I took a home pregnancy test that told me I was pregnant. I could not believe my eyes, and after checking with my husband that I was not imagining it, and running to the first open clinic I could find on a Sunday, it was confirmed that I was in fact pregnant.
I continued to do weekly acupuncture throughout pregnancy to help me manage the symptoms I was experiencing throughout my pregnancy journey. My symptoms shifted weekly, and although it was very tough, acupuncture helped me re-center, alleviate pain, keep digestion regulated, and stay balanced over the nine months.
I’m writing this 2.5 months postpartum. I had a healthy beautiful baby girl named Kate on February 15th, 2019. I am still in disbelief, but am certain that my dedication to acupuncture helped me not only get pregnant, but stay pregnant, and maintain my health post-pregnancy. My visits are less frequent at the moment due to my little one, but I am still going when I can to re-calibrate the system, so to speak.
I am forever grateful for having crossed paths with my practitioner, because she truly kept me on the path to motherhood. For anyone who might be losing hope, I highly recommend exploring acupuncture.
-Jaimie Finkelstein